YEAH, THANKS A LOT ERITREA

Because of NixX's recent departure, I had to work with Nebuchadnezzar The Mute today. And I think that name is pretty self explanatory. Well 'Nebu' is from Eritrea, and I remember the first time I had to work with her. NixX and I had a cigarette break and a conversation that went kinda like this:

Nero: 'But I don't wanna work with her. Please baby, can't you guys switch places?'
NixX:-'I don't like working with her either-'

Nero: 'You don't like working with her? It's because she's black right?!!?'
NixX: -'???'
Nero: 'First Jews, then Arabs and now black people?!...You're horrible, you know that!'

No, I'm lying we never had that conversation. So the real* conversation went like this:

Nero: 'But I don't wanna work with her. Please baby, can't you guys switch places?'
NixX:-'It's not that bad, really you won't even notice she is there.'
Nero: 'How long has she been working here? I never really talked to her, or heard her say anything. There was this one time, I asked her where everyone was but it took her so long to come up with an answer, I just walked off.'
NixX: 'That means you guys talked more than me and her ever did, and I work with her on daily basis.'
Nero: 'OMGWTF, you're soooo right!!!! We're like totally BFF now!!!'
NixX: '???'
Nero:'So what's her name again, Nebbar,Nebuz,Nebac....'
NixX: 'Nebuchadnezzar'
Nero: 'Christ...Where's she from?'
NixX: 'Eritrea...I think'
Nero: 'Where's that?'
NixX: 'Northeast Africa, next to Ethiopia and Sudan'
Nero: 'Wow, then she must be circumcised. Do you think she circumcised, I bet she is.'
NixX: 'This is perfect. See, I knew you'd find a topic you guys could talk about. You know, something light, to break the ice.'

..........I miss NixX

Anyways, me and Nebu spent 6 hours today working together, and she never mentioned the current condition of her clitoris once. Even though I kept asking her about it every 10 minutes or so.....(No I know, I'm sorry it's really not fanny...I know, I know I'm killing here....)
But she's actually a really nice girl and we talked all sorts of shit. Really, if you put two women from two completely different cultures together there's always this one thing they'll have in common. A global phenomenon women have been talking about since the dawn of time: 'MEN ARE BASTARDS'.

I also learned some new stuff today. Like, did you know Eritrea is a multilingual country? They have like 9 different languages there, even Italian, but no official language. But the most used language is Tigrinya. Which sounds like a pretty sweet baby name if you ask me.
Or did you know 50% of the country is Christian?
Well now you know, and all this useful information might even store itself in your brain and replace some of those sweet childhood memories you once had.

Nebu told me it's nice there and that she's going on vacation to visit some relatives next year. So from now on it's Nebuchadnezzar The Dirty Liar, cause it's not nice there. I looked it up and there has been a war going on since like, forever. And it's number 169 on the Worldwide Press Freedom Index Ranking, and do you know how many countries are on that list? Exactly! 169 motherfucking countries! And you really need to be a shitty country to be below North Korea on any list.
Ow and speaking of the root of all evil, did I mention that the first human-being ever is believed to be from Eritrea? I rest my case....

NERO

*I don't even remember conversations I had 5 minutes ago so don't expect me to exactly quote something that was said weeks ago. This is as close I can get to reality.

Moral schmoral!

My country is in trouble. It has been for some time now. Of course, it's easy to get in trouble when a whole bunch of people have to live together on just a little bit of land. And as if there weren't enough of us here, a whole lot of other people from other countries came here to live with us. Now, I'm not that guy with the weird moustache and the spasm in his arm saying that our country is full. But I do believe that a lot of our current trouble started when other people decided to come here and never leave again.
Yes, I know this is a subject that nobody wants to touch with a fifty-foot pole. The word integration in itself is enough to make people walk on eggshells. But that is exactly where everything went wrong. From the very beginning of the immigration-era, our society has been walking on eggshells. With us not being clear to the newcomers from the very beginning about how life is lived over here, how can we expect them to know what the rules are?
By now it is too late to change that. To cover up this mistake from long ago, our politicians now like to emphasize the words tolerance and respect for religion when the moral debate is on. In my opinion however, you don't need religion in order to have proper morals. As a matter of fact, you're probably better off without religion. Sure, in theory all religions are based on peace and love. But we all know the practice is a whole different ballgame. And religion should definitely have no place in politics.
The solution to this problem is very simple actually. We go back to the line this country is famous for: just act normal. And no, it is not normal to beat a young girl to a pulp because she had sex with her boyfriend (notice how the guy always gets away with it?). Just as it is not normal to beat someone to death because they asked you to turn the music down or to stop beating up someone else.
I think if we all stick to two extra rules, there will be no more problems.

1. I won't bother you if you won't bother me
2. If it ain't yours, don't take it

(Rule number one includes playing loud music on your mobile phone on buses and trains. This bothers me and will result in the phone either being rammed down your own throat or thrown out the window. Headphones were invented for a reason you know.)
As far as religion is concerned: this also falls in the category of rule number one. You can practice it, as long as it doesn't bother me. For religion I am now making an extra rule by the way: if your God is as allmighty as you say he is, trust in him to solve the problem and punish the bad guys. It is not up to you to decide who is wrong and who is right.
There, now we can all live together peacefully again.

NixX