I'm soooo sleepy

Today I have been mood swinging like a motherfucker. I went from tired to happy to slightly depressed. Then I was in love for about 4 hours and after that I just got pissed and now I'm back to tired again.
I also feared for my life today, remember the last post? Well I might be one of your dead myspace friends by next Monday.
Gosh Nero, having big plans for the weekend? No, I have zero plans for this weekend, yet I'll be fucked up Monday, how depressing is that.
I went to the hospital for a check up today and apparently my doctor is worried. Keep in mind that this is a lung&heart specialist that deals with hundreds of people with all sorts of lung diseases like 'the big C' (or as we call it the big K) everyday.
And it's not so much my lungs this time, I can combine the asthma and the cigarettes just fine.

No this time it's my liver that wants out. That fat fuck and I had a deal I would drink and he would breakdown the toxic substances. He did some other stuff but let's just say he was pretty preoccupied with the breaking down stuff.
And he was really really good at it (You where, my sweet sweet liver). But now the bitch wants out, and he wants half. Not only half, he wants to keep the house. Remember we're talking about my liver, not his body.

I guess he felt neglected next to my lungs, who are the center of attention every 10 minutes when I light a cigarette and I try to cough 'em up. Well, now he will get his chance to shine, Monday mourning when I have to be back in the hospital for some bad news.


Maybe my liver could hook up with Amy's liver, they could make little baby livers together and then one of the kids could move in with me. I just hope my liver wasn't related to this liver. (was that tasteless? I dunno...........whatever, people I'm the one dying here remember?!)

So Just in case, Nixx sweety , will you do something for me? If I ever die, although I'm still not fully convinced I can die, but if it turns out that i'm really not G.o.d. Could you please make sure nobody ever reads any of my writings. You can have my mac, my external hard drives and all nastiness that's on there. But for the love of god keep them away from anyone other that you, especially my parents. Also make sure they don't find out about any of my habits....
You know what, I'll drop by tomorrow and give you the keys to my place, as soon as I find them... Anyway make sure 'someone put it in my drink' (in my ice tea, I don't drink caffeine and alcohol remember). I think you know what to do with the music at the funeral, make 'em cry and then end with a little 'Me so horny' or 'Superfunkycalifragisexy' (any Right Said Fred is always good). Ow and please make sure my make-up looks good, and this is really important, NO BLUE EYESHADOW! I don't wanna look like hell when I'm meeting James Dean and River Phoenix for my first threesome in heaven (no pun intended). If it's really true that your hair keeps growing some more after you die, get that Iranian girl from work to fix my eyebrows. Make it look like I'm in that coffin because I was suffocated by my cleavage. What else...could you get my diaries cross out any names and leave them in a library when you go to Berlin. I know you can't do magic (what am i saying, of course you can) but, I would like to not be remembered as a lesbian. My aunt the shrink made that one up and I think the rest of my family believed that skank. And for fuck sake go and get a better job! That's it I think, one more thing, if by any chance 'saturnalia' by the Guttertwins is finally out get me a copy will you?

What's in it for you? There's 100 bucks hidden in the broken DVD player on my tv and some love hidden in a little red glittery box. If you don't want the box, flush it before they search my bedroom. Of course you can have all my books, movies, cd's and porn heels. And the sneakers, get the sneakers the pink adidas where an estimated 370 last time I checked.

Thanks NixX. Love ya!

This one's for you!

Nero